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Chapter 9 - The Garden of Safety

We moved to a small, sunlit cottage in the foothills of Boulder, far away from the dark Victorian house on Hawthorne Avenue. The new house had a large backyard with a view of the mountains, and a beautiful wraparound porch where Harper could play without fear.

I took a leave of absence from the ER, transitioning to a daytime role at a local pediatric clinic so I could be home with Harper every afternoon.

The healing process was slow. For the first few months, Harper had night terrors. She would wake up screaming about the "fire coming to take Daddy." Every time, I would sit by her bed, hold her hand, and sing her favorite songs until her breathing slowed and she fell back asleep.

We started going to a pediatric trauma therapist named Dr. Linda Avery. Dr. Avery used art therapy to help Harper express the things she couldn't say with words.

One Saturday afternoon, I found Harper sitting on the porch, painting on a small canvas. She was painting a bright yellow sun, and beneath it, two figures holding hands.

One was a little girl holding a green stuffed fox. The other was a tall man wearing blue scrubs.

"Who is that, Harper?" I asked, sitting down on the wooden steps beside her.

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"That's you, Daddy," she said, looking up at me with a smile that finally reached her eyes. "You’re the helper. You keep the fire away."

My chest swelled with an emotion so pure it brought tears to my eyes. I reached over and ruffled her hair. "You bet I do, kiddo. Always."

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